WASHINGTON, DC—President Bush today responded to Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s visit to Columbia University by issuing yet another ultimatum to Iran: become free immediately or we’ll do it for you. “And I have a feeling you won’t like our version of freedom” Bush added.
When questioned about his announcement, Bush cited the overwhelming success of the U.S. invasion of Iraq in 2003, saying “freedom’s on the move. Freedom likes to be free. It likes to move around and go new places. Funny thing about freedom, it’s always gettin’ restless.” A Bush aide who requested anonymity told AS.com that “we don’t even try to figure out what he’s saying these days. He just sorta babbles nonsense and then the next thing you know, we’re invading a new country.”
To protest Ahemenijad’s speech at Columbia University, hundreds took to the streets in New York, chanting “who’s your Ahmadinedaddy?”, a variation on a chant delivered by Yankee fans to Boston pitcher Pedro Martinez during the 2004 ALCS.